MPs to go to parliament with bald-heads to see how Sata will react

MPs to go to parliament with bald-heads to see how Sata will react

sata-1Male Opposition Members of Parliament plan to shave their hair as parliament re-convenes on September 20,2013 in order to find out how ailing Dictator Michael Sata will react when giving his official parliamentary speech.

According to sources within the opposition MP’s, the MP’s want to find out if Sata will continue reading his speech when he sees bald heads.

Sata always reacts negatively and flips when he sees bald heads.

Even today at the swearing in ceremony for the tribunals appointed to probe two Ndola High Court judges, Sata told former Chief Justice Mathew Ngulube to maintain his hair.

“We plan to go for official opening of parliament with shaved hair. We want to see how Sata will react. It seems he has spiritual problems with bold heads.I think he will even divert from his speech once he sees us with shaved heads” one source told the Zambian Watchdog.

Sata’s fear of people with bald heads is related to black magic.


President Michael Sata allegedly moved from the office that has been used by all past presidents at State House to another room following advice from his witch-doctor from Tanzania.

According to people very close to the president, the witchdoctor’s first advice to Sata when he just became president was that he must fire all officials with bald-heads at State House. The witch-doctor who sneaks into State House from some village in Tanzania also advised Sata to generally avoid people with bald heads.

After being sworn-in as president, Sata took a long time to shift into State House raising public eyebrows as to why he was operating from Rhodes park. But the Watchdog has now been informed that the Sangoma was still excursing State House and was not in a hurry saying ‘bigger men’ had stayed there.

When he finally moved in, one of his first actions was to remove State House Commissioner of Police Philemon Mutale. Mutale is an old man and his hair cannot grow anymore. He was told to stay at home.

Francis Chalabesa, his principle private Secretary, an old man from the Fredrick Chiluba regime has been told to keep hair or else.

By practice, police officers in Zambia like to shave leaving their heads bald. But those working at State house have been told to keep their hair. Those who can’t keep hair have been transferred to other stations.

But president Sata’s has not restricted his fear of baldheads to State House as advised by his Tanzanian voodoo man.

Whenever he sees a bald man, he freaks out.

When Sata visited Zimbabwe in January this year, he flipped when he saw that one of the Zimbabwean ministers had a baldhead.

Asking Mugabe and pointing at Zimbabwe’s minister of Indigenisation and Empowerment Minister Saviour Kasukuwere Sata said:

“Mr President, why does this man keep a bald head? During our days if a man is shaven like this, it was either he was coming from jail or he is mourning his dead wife.”

When campaigning for Steven Masumba in Mufumbwe on November 4, 2012, Sata again talked about baldheads.  He said MMD leader Nevers Mumba is not proud of himself because he constantly shaved his grey hair to hide his age.

Earlier in June during parliamentary by-election in Chama, Sata could not just resists talking about bald heads.

Sata told Chama voters that the presidency in Zambia is reserved for ‘Afro-men’ and not people with potato cuts like MMD President Nevers Mumba.

Addressing a rally in Chama where he was drumming up support for then PF candidate January Zimba, Sata said it was shocking that Mumba still had a potato cut despite the cut, from time in memorial, being reserved for ex-prisoners and those who have been widowed.

Sata added that a person who fails to keep hair in his own head can never manage to keep people in a country.

When chiefs from Southern province went to visit him at State House, Sata ordered them to remove their hats but what they did not realise was that he was checking if they had bald heads.

When Chewa chiefs went to visit him at State House recently, Sata made an issue of one named chief who was clean-shaved.

But when the Sangoma last visited Sata a week ago, he gave him fresh instructions. He told him that his woes (we don’t know which ones) are not going away because he uses a room that was used by people like Kenneth Kaunda.

He was advised to shift to another room immediately.

The Sangoma, according to people close to Sata, sprinkles white powder in all the routes he uses at State House including corridors.

He exorcises at night when most workers are home except for a few trusted security and personal assistants.

The office Sata moved to was used by the last Northern Rhodesia Governor, Sir Evelyn Hone.

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